Wednesday, October 1, 2014

Hail Eris!






Principia Discordia: or, How I Found the Goddess and What I Did to Her When I Found Her – Malaclypse the Younger, Lord Omar Khayyum Ravenhurst (1965)

            HAIL ERIS!  May the Golden Apple of Discord fall upon your enemies’ feet and not yours!  Everyone reading this sentence is hereby ordained as a Discordian Pope.  As a Pope, you are entitled to the following privileges:

1.    To invoke infallibility at any time, including retroactively
2.    To completely rework the structure of the Erisian Church
3.    To baptize, bury, and marry (with the permission of the deceased in the latter two cases)
4.    To excommunicate yourself and others
5.    To de-excommunicate yourself and others
6.    To re-excommunicate yourself and others.
7.    To de-re-excommunicate (no backsies) yourself and others
8.    To perform all rites and functions deemed to be improper to a Pope of Discordia.

There you have it folks.  If that is not enough for you then you are the problem, fnord.

“In conclusion, there is no conclusion.  Things go on as they always have, getting weirder all the time” – Robert Anton Wilson

The above quote is from RAW’s introduction to the Principia Discordia.  All Hail Discordia!
            I first read this book, this greatest of all books ever written or conceived, when I was a student at the University of Houston.  It made me think and laugh, and opened my eyes to the fnords all around us.  Re-reading this, I find it even funnier and more full of wisdom than ever!  Hail Eris!  May the sacred Chao not forsake you from her milky teat.

The Sacred Chao
 
            I have always loved the absurd.  I love the irrational as well as the rational.  I love it when the twisted strands of thought form knots of pure intellectual joy!  The Principia Discordia is chock full of these things and more.  We are all very lucky to exist in a world where Eris rules all, and the gods fear her.
            As a Discordian Pope, I have started several failed religions: The Church of Letterman, The Church of the AlmightyMario, The New Atheist Church, and more.  They failed for the same reason all religions eventually fail.  They were all based on bullshit.  Discordianism, however, is providing you bullshit based on reality!  They have succeeded where others have failed!  Hail Eris!

(This book can be read online here: http://www.principiadiscordia.com/book/1.php )

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